Importance of a Good Father

Published on July 15, 2023July 16, 2023 by Justine1 Comment

When Mom rescues us, she has no idea what happened the year we were on the run.

Bringing us to the farm she grew up on, Mom gives my grandparents charge as she finds a job. They are at a loss how to care for us. We laugh while being spanked and cry hysterically when bumping against something. Soon they decide boundaries are necessary.

In school a cute boy teases me pretending to kiss me. I scratch him. Mom finds out and says, “I will cut your nails if you don’t stop.”

We leave the safe place the beginning of 4th grade and move to a basement apartment in town. This gives us access to children to play with and not much supervision. I find a boy to invite into the storage closet and teach him how to kiss. I am nine years old doing what I was taught.

Mom marries my second dad at the end of that year and all my teaching boys how to kiss ends.

My new father has different standards. He wears clothes and doesn’t walk around naked like my first dad. We all have our own bed and plenty to eat.

I keep my distance from boys until high school when one of my brothers friends takes me out.

He puts his hands where he wants and then talks about me, “She is easy!”

I don’t know I have the option to say, “NO!”

Once time I play strip poker. It ends up in sexual foreplay.

This is my first,”No.”

I get hired to work at Hardee’s for the opening in our town.

There just happened to be one of those boys that asks, “Are you a virgin?”

“I don’t know.”

“I can check and tell you!”

I keep away from him.

My senior year I have a boyfriend a few years older. I trust him.

He asks, “Will you allow me to kiss you?”

I don’t know how to have a boyfriend.

Mom writes me a letter, “I expect you to bring him by the family. Hiding means sex.”

I did start bringing him home. He even came to Sunday dinner with my grandparents.

My first dad brought the people into my life that taught me how to please a man when I am seven years old. He also takes me out of the stable family life I know and thrive in. He turns my life into the things made from nightmares.

My second dad keeps me safe! I don’t end up on the street!

I DO get a college degree!

This morning, God let me know HE IS THE GOOD, GOOD FATHER!

God let me know He is with me in the dark days, bringing light to the darkness always. He has given me strength to go through! Now He is giving me the ability to enjoy life, not just survive! He is my Abba Daddy!

GOD IS SO VERY GOOD!

How Good or Bad are People Part two

Published on July 12, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

God dropped more information in my heart today.

Both dads went to church.

Dad #1 grew up with an alcoholic father and a praying mom. He ran from consequences.

Dad #1 said, “My dad told me to sit at Mom’s feet as she reads her Bible, but she never told me about Jesus.”

His first wife said, “He always made friends with pastors at church.”

Hanging around God’s people will feel good but it doesn’t transform your life or bring healing.

Dad #2 was insecure from being called out different in grade school. He coped by believing he could create perfection in his life with no failure.

He attended church, joined the choir, and committees. They distract but don’t bring healing to the soul.

When something interrupted perfection, his voice boomed, “YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO RESPECT ME!”

Controlling everything in your presence creates an allusion of peace, but real peace comes from Jesus.

Both Dad’s found Jesus and changed from the inside out.

Dad #1 quit running and has stayed married to the same woman for over 20 year.

Dad #2 stopped yelling and controlling people. He became tender and asked to be forgiven for raising his voice.

Anyone want real change in their lives?

SAY “Jesus, I want to know You, fill me with Your LOVE!”

God is Good!

How Good or Bad are People

Published on July 9, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

Am I the only one who puts

good and bad

labels on people?

My first dad’s mistakes cause pain leading to trauma. His bad label holds no good. My second dad rescues my mom and brings order. His good label contains no bad.

Some actions of my second dad are not so good and my conscience can’t accept this. My dreams try to work on this and reoccur every visit.

I attribute all bad dreams to my first dad, but God sets me straight. The first dream I am seven, hiding to protect myself. My brave 19 year old self works in the second dream to protect my family.

My mom tells me every visit, “You were always Daddy’s little girl.”

God uses the dreams and my mom’s words to help me understand.

My first dad is fun and joyful until lies catch up to him. He chooses to follow the lies instead of The Grace and Truth of Jesus, leading to my pain.

My second dad doesn’t know The Grace and Truth until he is 89 so he lives with standards. When he meets Jesus he becomes loving.

The Answer: Deuteronomy 30:19b I set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. So choose life in order that you my live.

This choosing Life is often a minute by minute decision.

The Truth about The Movie

Published on July 8, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

My husband and I went to the, “The Sound of Freedom!”

It was the type of movie to watch without the distraction of popcorn. I don’t think anyone left to go to the bathroom even though many had the desire.

Tears flowed many times but when I made it to the bathroom, sobs of tears escaped like a dam braking. What do I do except make conversation as I wash my hands and grab the paper towel.

This Blessed woman listened and hugged me as I told her how my mom saved me. Then God Redeemed me bring healing.

I listen to Angel studio talk with the director and actor about the success at the box office, being #1 on the 4th! “We want more! We need to keep this movie in theaters so tell people about i!”

They said, “Many theaters broke out in applause twice. Once at the end of the movie and then again after listening to Jim Caviezel talk!”

If you need they have free tickets paid forward by people who think it is important to be seen. They don’t want lack of money to be a reason keep people away. Look up Angel Studios.

God Bless everyone who goes and tells others to go!

GOD IS GOOD!

Strength to do the Impossible

Published on July 6, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

About 24 hours ago the house needed a good cleaning for an appraisal.

It has been a while since I have cleaned much of it. Things keep happening.

Looking at the basement stairs, muddy footprints remind of the water pouring in our basement.

Under the stairs, feathers and toys gather dust reminding me of our daughter’s cats who have moved out.

Upstairs, the warmth of summer compels our dogs to shed. Their hair combines with dirt tracked in from my shoes when I garden.

I add to the mess with piles. A learned action from having scoliosis.

We have too much stuff, and no place to put it: feeling stuck.

God gave me the ability to tackle the mess.

I was awake and busy for a whole 23 hours. The last 8 hours was spent cleaning, putting things away, boxing stuff, sweeping, moping, and vacuuming. Fitbit tracked 8000 steps from midnight to noon.

This all goes against what my doctor says, “You are NOT SUPPOSE TO help your daughter move or work in your garden! YOU HAVE SCOLIOSIS!”

GOD SAYS DIFFERENT!

God is Good! Smile!

Save the Children

Published on July 6, 2023July 6, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

I try to open a conversation with the women in front of me, asking questions as we stand in line.

She answers my question and turns back to the line. When I ask what movie she is there to see, she asks about the movie I am seeing.

It took me a bit to describe The Sound of Freedom I started to think about the man who saved the kids and how he started, mistakenly I said the DEA instead Homeland Security.

My next thought was, “How horrible situation is at the southern border with all the small unaccompanied young children! Who sends a three or ten year old on that trip?”

I keep my mouth shut because of politics, but when the movie starts I started crying and am convicted of not opening my mouth.

LORD HELP me to ALWAYS speak out about the life of a child being trafficked!

God is Good! Man is not!

A Gift from God

Published on July 4, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

Today our daughter brought my husband and I out for an early birthday dinner.

We pick up our daughter, check out the improvements to her house, pet the cats, and leave.

We arrive, order, and are having a wonderful time when a couple walks into the restaurant and sits down.

There is something familiar about her face.

I’m trying not to stare. Do we know each other? Finally recognition!

I get up to get a hug. It has been many years and much life has happened.

What is the chance that we happen to be at the same restaurant at the same time sitting so we can see each other?

In case you notice in the picture, they received food while I got my hug. I sat down to and empty plate. My order was forgotten. It’s my birthday!

So what are the chances that we meet? Only God could time it so perfectly!

God Is So Very Good!

Mom The Hero

Published on July 3, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

I have been watching everything I find about the movie.

“The Sound of Freedom!”

It is done excellently!

https://www.angel.com/tickets/sound-of-freedom!

Go see the movie.

This could have been my life! But Mom fought to find us!

It wasn’t a thing then, but Mom was controlled by her husband.

She often said, ” Every time I made a friend we moved. Often money for milk was found in his pants doing laundry.”

She also said, “The truth always changed. What was TRUTH yesterday, was not TRUTH today”

Mom said,”It was good to have him leave, I might have ended up in the psych ward. I never wanted you kids taken.”

Arriving home to an empty house, She waited, “Justine will call, she knows the number!”

When I didn’t call she packed up the house and took a bus to Minnesota. She made an appointment with the governor. He listened as she cried demanding help.

“It is not illegal for a father to take his children.”

Regrouping, she found a job and hire detectives. They found us a year later.

The first plan was to kidnap us back, but it didn’t work.

This led to court and three days on the witness stand being grilled. This affected her so profoundly that she could never again lead any group.

Mom’s lawyer didn’t call Dad to the stand, instead he gave the judge the nine page explanation of why Dad left with us.

She was awarded custody with one condition.

We had to be out of the state that day!

Out of school to the airport with possessions in paper bags.

Our flight took us to her parents farm. It was our saving grace.

Her parents thought it was best to go back to her husband, being a divorced women with kids was not good. She couldn’t even buy a vehicle without her husband or father’s signature.

Forty years later she called, “Why couldn’t you understand what I went through?”

“When

“You were only seven years old, you couldn’t understand!”

The day Mom died, the Pastor called, “What was your most important memory?”

“She came and got us!”

She saved my life.

God is Very Good!

How To Become

Published on July 2, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

I have become the person that walks in LOVE, by spending time in The Word of God Daily.

Lifting people up, and seeing the ones who feel unseen is the passion for my life.

Talking to God every day is my favorite pastime. He is my friend in the lonely times, my protector in the dangerous times, my provider when I don’t know where the money for tomorrow is coming from, my companion, and my guide all day every day!

John 15:7-8 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it shall be done for you. By this is My Father glorified, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples.

The archaic definition for abide is Live and Dwell.

The more I abide in the Word of God, it washes my soul. Abiding for me takes reading it out loud so I hear it also!

Meditating on a passage day and night erase the negative thought patterns and chase out darkness filling the recesses of my mind. Seldom is the darkness able to enter my thoughts.

The more I meditate on the Word the more Joy bubbles up from the inside: It is Life.

Don’t allow depression and darkness to rule.

Choose Life and Live in Love! Amen!

Sonship and Daughtership

Published on July 1, 2023 by JustineLeave a comment

Knowing we are sons and daughters of the Father, will transform our lives completely!

Twenty years ago we move to Kentucky and start a new church. They ask me to lead the children’s music.

For our first Easter Service we have wonderful music that includes the adult choir and the congregation. I am leading the children, the adult choir sings, and I raise my hands asking the congregation to stand and sing.

The side my family is sitting, stands! My side sits and frowns! I try again, they grudgingly rise and sing.

It was the most confusing thing I have ever encountered in church.

Later I get a phone call from church, “We need you to come down and talk.”

“I really don’t want to.”

“If you don’t come then you can no longer teach Sunday school.”

My world crashes!

Twenty years earlier, I am 21 attending a church with a college youth group. My accident occurs during a trip with this youth group.

After church with people surrounding us, the pastor asks, “Are you having sex with your fiance?”

“Yes.”

“Then I cannot conduct your wedding.”

“Why not?”

“If you have sex before marriage then you will have sex with the mailman or the milkman or anyone else in your life.”

Humiliation fills me, I ride my bike back across town as fast as I can, so alone.

Over time I grow in knowledge of “Whose I am!”

When I am asked to meet because of a problem. I am able to go with no fear.

Walking in the Righteousness of Jesus makes me the daughter of the Father! He fills me with SELF WORTH.

A leader of a group calls to have me come to meet. I am able to go with NO FEAR!