How do I get rid of the thing in my soul that is still living even after I have forgiven, prayed for, and walked in love with?
God has impressed upon me I need to forgive and LOVE the person who controlled me for 45 years. There is still a rage that can surface when I remember the words I heard, “HOW DARE YOU!” and “YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO RESPECT ME!”
Is it a process? Looking in a journal from 2008 I found the question, “Who yelled at me?”
I asked God that question for 10 years. The answer was not in my daily life, but regular visits conditioned me to accept put down’s and yelling as normal! The only reason I knew a problem existed is my home is Filled with PEACE and JOY!
Spending 6 weeks this winter, being caregiver and helping him move, God helped me be Jesus to this broken person. Holy Spirit worked in me and made me who I needed me to be. The only way I could do this was to spend an hour both in the morning and evening Praising God and praying to WALK IN LOVE, and BE AN EXAMPLE OF GOD’S GRACE! He gave me the ability to walk in Love and hold nothing against him, asking for his salvation.
RETURNING HOME, I found the need to continue spending an hour in Praise and Worship to keep my mind in Love and Grace; not letting it shift to bad thoughts.