Renewing My Mind Has Brought Miracles

My mind was filled with darkness that would overtake me unless I could keep it pushed down. In high school I would study in front of the television so I could actively push out the noise and concentrate on my work, in quiet I would not be able to control the darkness.

That darkness filled my life because the man who brought me to the baptismal font also lay me on Satan’s altar. I am sure he had no idea it was real, he just thought it was a good time.

My way to control the darkness was to have the radio and television on at the same time all day.

BUT GOD HAD A BETTER WAY!  Bart entered my life and God brought a radio station with His Truth to lift my soul!

God moved us to Jacksonville to teach me how to depend on Him for everything. He showed me Joyce Meyer, who has taught me for over 20 years how to Forgive; Do Good to those who hurt me; and to Take all my Thoughts Captive by Keeping only the good thoughts, and kicking out the bad thoughts. (II Corinthians 10:5)

What helped the most was Ephesians 4:22-24, in reference to my former manner of life, i lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit and that i BE RENEWED IN THE SPIRIT OF my MIND and PUT ON THE NEW SELF, which IN GOD HAS BEEN CREATED IN RIGHTEOUSNESS and HOLINESS of THE TRUTH.

God taught me to banish depression and invite Joy into my life by replacing words of defeat with God’s Word of success and righteousness.

Eph4:29, 32, 15 let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth but only such as it is good for edification according to the need that it may give grace to those who hear. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Speak the truth IN LOVE, we are to GROW UP in all aspects into Him, who is the head, Christ.

I know only too well that the fight of the enemy is real so I put on the armor of God daily to help me fight the Good Fight and be Victorious. It doesn’t just happen, when I get dressed in the morning I have to put on my clothes, in the same way I PUT ON the Full Armor of God!

Eph 6:10-13 Finally, BE STRONG IN THE LORD and in the strength of His might. PUT ON the full armor of God that you may be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood , but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God , that you may be able to resist in the evil day and having done everything to STAND FIRM.

I am able to say victory shows in the ability to be in a quiet room and Be Filled with The PEACE That Passes All Understanding!

Do you know the Power of The Word has the ability to work Miracles in your daily life? Seek Him in His Word and Find Him and The Power of His Might!  God Bless you! Amen!

 

Dysfunction And Grace

My pastor’s sermon last Sunday mentioned that troubled families have an atmosphere of, “don’t feel,” and “don’t talk,” and especially “don’t trust.”

I lived this but didn’t know  we were different. From the outside we look like the perfect family.

In 2013, I flew to Oregon to help my mom after surgery. My sister drove me to Portland to pick up a rental car and we met our brother for lunch. I was 50 years old and it was the first time the three of us sat together alone, without spouses, parents, or children taking our attention.

We talked for the first time about the things that happened back in 1969-1973. The conversation  centered around what happened. We never gotten around to how we feel about what happened. The waitress heard enough to think  we could be talking about a movie.

God started to open my eyes in 2017 to our family dynamics!  I tried to communicate what I was understanding, but my parents couldn’t deal with the emotions and changed the topic saying, “Shall we play cards?”

This is the point texted a friend realizing, “My family is nuts!”

May of 2010, God brought us to Westwood during one of the lowest points in our lives.  We have been accepted and thank you.

It took me a year or more to gain enough boldness to go to the Tuesday morning Bible study.  After a few weeks, a woman invited me to join everyone for lunch after each meeting. This offer set me up to learn how to “BE” in a group.

Shortly afterwards I joined the book club the church offered. They accepted me! These women taught me how to be in a group of women my age. The books they choose also tapped into emotions that had been buried for over 40 year,  God Bless each of them for staying.

I believe Westwood is a place God wants to use to help the broken people. I do thank each and everyone of you who has gone on this journey with me. God Bless you all with His Mercy and Grace, Amen.

Health and Weight

My whole life I have been skinny and didn’t understand as I gained weight. In my thirties my weight rose to 130 pounds and I told myself it was good because my body worked better!

My weight continued to rise another 10 pounds each of the next two decades. I wanted to do something, but what could I do? Exercising most days didn’t seem to do much. My real problem comes from weakness due to scoliosis, and the need to eat food for energy to function.

January 2011, God gave me 5 new vertebrae and started to grow nerves cut in 1976 during scoliosis surgery. 

I started to be able to run 5 days every week.

It took food to give me energy to be able to run. I added another 10 pounds, bringing me to my high weight of 160 on my 5’4″ and shrinking frame. Some of it was muscle but my face showed something different.

Over the next few years of running, I grew stronger and gained confidence! Two different years, I notice the shorts I was buying were two inches smaller from the previous year.  The last thing I heard before life took a turn was my daughter say, “You are very skinny!”

The next three years we drove 5,000 mile many times a year to visit family as Mom died and moved Dad out of the house. My real problem came when Bart, my husband of 36 years started to have difficulty walking and keeping his balance. This lead to neck surgery to save his spinal cord. Two years later he is still recovering and getting stronger. The first year after his surgery, he could do nothing! It took everything I had to keep life going, and I had nothing left to keep me strong. Then COVID hit!

So now after a year of stress and the covid fears I find myself struggling to fit into my clothes. I try running. It helps, but I can’t do it regularly yet. My weight goes down for a few days, but I can’t yet keep going and my weight goes back up.  Getting busy with cleaning and yard work is good, but my body isn’t as strong as it was, and it gives out.

Two days ago Bart read something in Readers Digest about intermittent fasting. There were a couple ideas: one was fast two days a week; I have fasted for 24 hours many times, I loose weight, but food gets thrown out. The other idea is to eat everything in six hours.

Hope has arrived. I have tried the eating everything in six hours for two days. I am pleased to find my weight lower than I have seen for months. It is hard to eat all I want in 6 hours. Bart believes he is seeing more energy in me and I have less pain today. I guess it will be a wait and see. I will keep you posted.

God Bless you all with The Peace only Jesus can give. Amen.

A God Meeting

A trip to the grocery store led to a God encounter with man in the pharmacy line.

I do make a habit to talk with people especially if we are in line together; not everyone wants to talk, but often enough Holy Spirit guides the conversation.

Today, I felt The Spirit of God as we were talking and the thought of my blog came to mind. Before I could say anything he was called to be helped and I thought that was that.

After I was done, with prescription in hand, I walked right past this same man. Realizing it was him, I stopped and went back and said, “I felt God as we were talking.”

He agreed. I gave him my blog and a couple God stories. It was interesting to watch because he took out a pen and paper to write down my blog address.

I am reminded again that I need to sit down and write the stories of how God, my ABBA Daddy, has been healing my broken soul and body, these last ten years. I know that these stories will help other people have hope and Seek God, The God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob!

The one thing I will say with confidence is, Seek Jesus! Don’t just look but Seek Him with ALL YOUR MIGHT and Know that He will bring healing.

The man I was talking with said that God healed him quickly.  I on the other hand have walk through each step of my pain so I have many stories of Redemption.

Jesus says, Seek and you will find! Believe Him! His Word is True! The more I have studied the Bible the more I have found it is all True.

There are things I have not understood for 30 years but every once and a while God will answer a question and plop it into my soul with understanding. Jesus says ask and it will be given. I did ask Jesus about a pain He took away, He said, “People don’t have because they don’t ask!”

So Ask Jesus, Believe! and Receive!

I will admit He doesn’t give timelines on healing or anything. But you don’t get, if you don’t ask! So Ask and know you are a favorite child so ask as a favorite child asks their Daddy.

Jesus says as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who who believe in His name, who were born not of blood, nor the will of the flesh, nor of man, but of God. John 1:12-13.

God Bless you as you Seek Him! Amen!

 

Fear vs Trust

How often do you believe a person when they say they will do something for you?

God is exposing my fear of believing people.

My life has been filled with people who I could not trust, but when I found some who where trustworthy, they still messed up.

God is showing me my fear as I play “The legend of Zelda Breath of the Wild” video game. I have become very good at using bow and arrows! The bows break often but I have found a maker of bows who said, “Anytime this bow is damaged or broken come back and I will replace it for you.”

I went back when my bow was damaged and ready to break, he didn’t do anything. I was confused and thought I miss understood again. But when I lost the bow by braking, he replaced it. I have gone back 3 times and I am learning how to trust.

This translates to real life as I experience fear of ordering online to pick up in the store parking lot. I don’t trust they will get what I want or/and they will not be there when scheduled, or they take off with my goods.

God is pushing me to trust that it will work as created to work.

maybe my biggest fear is waiting for a stranger to come up to my vehicle while I sit and wait…Help Jesus help!

When God exposes a weakness He heals it. God is Very Good!

Lessons in Trust

A few years ago, I found through counseling that my emotional age  stopped at about age 7.  This basically means I am fearful of authority and do everything possible to not get into trouble. Post traumatic stress also affects the way I respond to situations.

I have been working hard to grow into my 50 something age that I am and be set free from reacting to PTSD triggers.

These are 3 stories in my life at airports that showing how God sends people to help the childlike.

My first flight as an adult, my future husband mailed me plane tickets to visit him. I arrived at the airport and boarded the plane with my ticket in hand. The nice stewardess sent me back to the building to get my ticket checked.
Today is so different, can you believe I could walk onto the plane without anyone checking to see if I had a ticket?

About fifteen years later I have a chance to fly again, my sister asks me to be a Godparent for her new son.  Michelle, our three year old, and I are flying out a week earlier than Bart. We change planes in Atlanta, Georgia.

Asking how to get to our connecting flight, because I have never changed planes before. We are directed to a tram which makes me nervous, it is new and scary. Following the crowd we each carry a backpack, a suitcase, and hold hands tightly so we don’t get separated.
Everyone piled onto the tram and I did my best to join them, but Michelle was pulling away, fearing the crowd!

I thought I was successful until the door shut on my daughter’s hand!

Michelle is on the outside but I am holding her hand! “Oh God, what does this mean? What do I do?”

Before I have a chance to scream, the door opens and I pull pull Michelle inside.

God Bless the person I see in the hall with a walkie-talkie! They  saved my daughter! Someone next to me mentions, some places don’t have that person to stop the tram. Relief fills my soul.
A month later, my grandmother dies. I am a bit of a mess, she was my safe place.
I wanted to bring Michelle with me because I am much braver as Mom than just plain me. I am thankful we don’t need to go through Atlanta, but arriving in Chicago we find about real airport stories and snow delays.
Leaving the plane, we find that our connecting flight is canceled. Fear and anxiety rise! My worst nightmare! What do I do?
Thankfully, I find an airport worker who answers my first question and walks me to the line for new tickets.
 We get new tickets and find seats to wait. I am feeling alone and wonder, “Will we make it to the funeral? Did we fly all this way to miss the funeral? What good will that do?”
The seats around us fill up with people waiting for the next flight out, and many are flying to Minneapolis.  Some of the more seasoned flyers start asking questions to get flight information.
Someone hears of a gate that might have a flight out. A group of 30-40 people get up and walk to that gate and wait until someone else finds another tip. Ten or so trips up and down the B corridor tire my body as I carry a back pack, suitcase, and my 3 year old.
Finally, a gate is found actually checking tickets and a line forms. Michelle and I find the back of the line. When I reach the desk, I give them my ticket believing everything is done and we can relax until we are on the plane.
The clerk looks at my ticket and says, “I’m sorry but you have the wrong tickets! You need to go to the back of the line and wait!”

Crushed, I walk to the end of the line. Tears streaming down my face, I am falling apart! Holding tightly onto my daughter I ask, “What am I going to do?”

All of a sudden, a women comes from the front of the line and says, “Remember God!”

Something in me changes, “God is here!” Hope rises.
Immediately, a man walks from the front of the line announcing loudly to everyone, “My ticket is for gate E3!
Quickly I realize that is my ticket and I ask, “Can we go with you?”
Seeing my load he grabs my suitcase and we follow, “Thank you so much for helping! I am on the way to my grandma’s funeral”
He says,”This is my first time back in the states for 10 years.”
Arriving at the gate, we see nothing. No Notice of a plane scheduled to fly, no people to ask questions. We are alone in this huge airport. The three of us sit and wait.
He asks, “Would your husband mind if I rented a car and drove us to Minneapolis?”
“Yes, my husband would be upset. Thank you for offering.”
“I will get some food for you, if you will watch my suitcase.”
“Thank you.”
The minute he is out of sight, I start to worry, “they say” “do not hold a strangers luggage.” Am I in trouble for holding his luggage?
Fear rises and I hear an announcement over the intercom, “The flight to Minneapolis is leaving at gate B23 in 30 minutes!”
Panic! “I gotta go! I need to run! But I said I would watch his luggage! I can’t leave his suitcase!”
The man returns, carrying a tray filled with food.
“I didn’t know what kind of food you would like so I picked up a variety.”
“Thank you!” Both Michelle and I are hungry, but I am leery thinking he could have put something in the food. I think the milk, cereal, and the banana are safe and we eat.
After we eat, he throws the extra food and says, “Will you watch my suitcase again? I want to make arrangements in case this flight doesn’t go.”
“No problem.”
This time I see he is on a phone down the hall. Again the announcement rings out, “The flight to Minneapolis leaves in 10 minutes.” I want to pick up all my stuff and run back to that gate! But, I can’t leave his suitcase!
Finally, he returns and says, “Would you like me to make other arrangements for you?”
“Yes, thank you.”
The minute he leaves, “Last call for the flight to Minneapolis!”
Panic roars, I have to leave! I start to put my things together so I can run, but his suitcase! It is an anchor holding me in place.

He returns and I realize the flight has gone. There is nothing to do but wait and hope this flight will happen.

Hours later a sports team arrives, soon after clerks arrive at the desk. They put up the flight number and time on the board. Things are looking up!
Fight attendants show up allowing us to board the plane. I think it is strange that the man who took care of us walks past us like he never met us, (I have noticed  God will use a person for a moment in time to tell me something or help me and then they go on their life like they never met me). The man has a first class ticket and the only reason I am able to board first is Michelle is only 3.
We sit in the back of the plane hearing talk that we might not have pilots. “Help Jesus!”
Pilots arrive, the plane is cleared of snow and ice. We take off.
My sister and brother meet us at the gate and our luggage is waiting!  Everything is as it should be! We are on time for the funeral and everything worked.
My Loving Heavenly Father sent help!  When I was so stressed I forgot about Him, He sent a person to remind me, “I Am Here!”
Then He sent a man to anchor me, and forced me to wait.
GOD IS GOOD!

Lifting others lifts yourself.

What is a simple way to find favor with God?

ISAIAH 58:9b says if you stop pointing fingers at others and give yourself to the afflicted and hungry then God will make your gloom as noonday!

What does that mean in your daily life? Stop focusing on me and my and consider others and their pain. How can you help?

Step out to engage others in Love as God by lifting others.

What is gloom?

What is noonday?

Which do you prefer?

Say something nice when you cross paths.

God is Good!

Surprise

God works all things together for Good so all the things that are going wrong will be turned somehow for our good.

One of the most vivid examples of this is ten years ago we were asked to leave our church. We were feeling scared and abandoned. What will we do if something happens and we have no pastor or church to call? We are new to the state and don’t have friends or relatives anywhere near! What will we do?

I said, “I know by next year all will be well and even Good!”

With in six months we found a new church and in that church God brought people into my life to start the healing of my junky past and a bonus at twelve months, God gave me a new sacrum. This took away 28 years of a constant dull ache.

I will not say the time between the hard end and the beginning of the Blessing is ever easy; but keeping hope alive changes life and, hope does not disappoint!

Walking in Hope, changes how the in-between is  experienced. Believing the Best puts Joy into your step!

What do you see in the picture? The beautiful flowers? or the weeds? That is an example of living in Hope.  Changing what you are focusing on to something enjoyable. So no matter what your struggle, find a way to Hope and change the atmosphere you are living in!

God is Good!

Joy In The Middle

Today I am filled with Joy in a difficult season, most people would be stressed and upset but I see God moving and redeeming.

Receiving a phone call at 2 A.M. may cause panic, but I have found Peace Filling in my soul as I Trust Jesus.  I raise my arms and Praise Jesus in spite of all that is going on around me.

God is always working to keep His children safe, especially when we take our eyes off of Him. When something catches our eye, changing our focus, the road turns, and we fall into the ditch. Often it takes a few tries from different angles for God to get our attention, but He doesn’t quit until we allow Him to pull us out of our ditch.

This week my family is taking another stab at getting out of the proverbial ditch. I believe we are out of the rut that held us down as we Follow Jesus back into the Father’s arms.

Wisdom says it will not be an up only trial but God is working and I see the Promises of God being fulfilled.

God is Very Good!